the big ol' half-moon gloats
as it bloats you
and floats you
across the room
like a Ringling Brothers elephant
riding a peculiarly small
but brightly coloured circus ball
until with a splat!
you teeter this way and that
until you tumble down
flat
on the floral-covered crippled couch
where you spread out
and unfold
and unfold
and unfold
just like you were a road map
of Eurasia
oh yes, i love you baby
and i'm a dummy
for your tummy
even when it's a bit crumb-crummy
but, heck, just let me vacuum it first
it's appalling
when things start falling
and folks stop calling
not because you've gained
a hundred pounds or two
not because there's really nothing much to do
but you see
these new hybrid cars
are just a bit too small
in stature
and it would take
another rapture
to squeeze you
in the back
of a car like that
it would be like
squeezing Gibraltar
through the tiniest crack
sort of like forcing white through black
oh yes, i love you baby
just the way you are
maybe i'll buy us a big classic 60's car
and we'll drive away but not too far
and watch the sun rise in a red and yellow burst
some say that summer sun
is a cruel old hack
a steamy heart breaker
some say a one-eyed Jack
but when we're on the beach
where it's all surf and sand
all broken shells and pretty sea glass
you'll have to dress
in pastels and no-tells
to cover up that ass
no, no, no ...
no more hiding
in a straight black sack
think a little less Aretha Franklin
and a little more Roberta Flack
oh yes, i love you baby
but no more sodas and no chocolate bars
no more stout ale in dingy Brit bars
no more hiding under the dark night's stars
no more believing that your life is cursed
i LOVE that painting!
ReplyDelete